Answers

I got a couple of really good questions after my last post so I thought it was high time I answered them.

Offensive questions- what are they?

You know, I can tell the difference between an innocent, genuine question asked with a sincere desire to learn and understand and a question from a person who is being an ignoramus and poses the question to be totally inappropriate and rude. Of course, there is terminology and phrases I would rather not hear (such as the "M" word) however sometimes the m-word is used by someone who genuinely thinks that is the correct term. (and I will reiterate, the m-word is an offensive term in most circumstances) When that happens I simply tell the person the words most prefered and why. Most people genuinely are interested and want to know and be educated.

There is also the difference between a second glance and people looking because they are curious and have never seen a person with dwarfism, and those who simply ogle, grab the person next to them and point at me and think I'm there for their entertainment. I understand I look different. I understand people are going to look, but I do know the difference between polite curiosity and those who are just....well, rude.

It's ok for children to look. I understand they are also going to comment and ask questions. Children are like that, especially little ones who haven't yet developed the filter between what their eyes see, what their mind thinks and what their mouth says. I try and smile and say hello to children. I do hate it when parents in their embarrassment will hurry their children away, tell them not to be so rude or, in some instances, smack them for looking at me. It makes difference and disability into something shameful and never to be discussed. I have often told parents it's ok, that I understand and I'm ok about answering their children's questions. I've had lovely parents who have approached me bravely and asked me what is the right thing to tell their children. I want to hug parents like that! Awesome!

Having said all the above though, I should really say that this is how I feel about it all. (most days anyway) Naturally there are days where I couldn't be bothered dealing with it all and wish I could just walk down the street in relative anonymity like the majority of the human race can. Do you have any idea what a gift being able to blend just like everyone else is??? Enjoy it!

There may be some people of short stature that don't have the same outlook as I do. I have a friend who is average sized and she has a 23 year old daughter who is short statured. Neither of them can tolerate ANY kind of negative attention. A second glance, an innocent question from a child, blatant staring is just so hard for them to handle and both of them go through life angry and ready to lash out any time it happens. I find it hard to watch. Despite me trying to encourage them to think another way about it all, they continue with their anger at the world, which is incredibly sad.

Do I have any special powers as an X-woman?

I LOVE this light hearted question! It made me think!

YES! I have the amazing ability to fit in small spaces, curl up in a small space to sleep, play on children's play equipment with them and get cheaper clothing because I am in childrens sizes! Ha ha!

Seriously though, I think all people with my condition have (if they are given the opportunity to develop it without people stepping in and constantly helping them) an amazing ability to be resourceful and problem solve. This is where average statured parents of short statured children need to take a step back and not anticipate problems or help a child or adult with short stature if it looks like they might not be able to do something. I seem to have been born with this ability to be able to work out how to do something if, at first glance, it may seem as though I can't.

I have used telephone books as an extra step, pulled out drawers in a cabinet to create a step-ladder, used pens to reach light switches and lift buttons, coathangers in shops to hook around another piece of clothing hung up too high for me to reach, a lanyard to lasso over a door handle that's too high, a shovel as a lever to lift something too heavy, towels under the fridge to make it easier to shift on my own. There's always a way to do something. It may not be conventional, but I'll work something out.

So, there you have it! Feel free to ask more. I will get back to writing about normal, every day stuff soon and may have the odd thing here and there where I post some perspectives from the lower level, but for the most part it will be business as usual.

OH! Before I go.....KUDOS TO PETER DINKLAGE FOR WINNING AN EMMY!!! Oh. My. Goodness! How excited was I? FINALLY, a short statured person recognised for their incredible talent! I must admit to crying when he won. Now for Australia to move beyond the thinking that dwarf actors need to be a "character" like an elf or a fantasy creature, or an object to be laughed at. My desire is to see a short statured actor on something like Home & Away or Neighbours (not that I like those shows) as just another person in Summer Bay or Ramsay Street. I'd love to see them in the background and then slowly introduced as just another person with a regular life that contributes to the plot in some way. There may be a few episodes where normal issues regarding their short stature come to the forefront, but for the most part they are just part of the cast. I would love to see that. Hopefully the recognition of the talent of Peter Dinklage (and by the way, I personally know the guy who played his stunt double in "I Love You Too") will be the beginnings of the realisation of that dream.

Mr Peter Dinklage. He looks uncannily like my son actually!