The other side

I can't even begin to describe the relief that is today. Our whole existence for the months leading up to yesterday was about yesterday. It was our entire focus - keeping her calm, healthy and ready; doing all the things that needed to be done in order for yesterday to run as smoothly as possible. Although there are many physical things you have to do to prepare - blood tests, ECG's, lung function, Xrays, chiropractic adjustments - it's the emotional preparations that are the most taxing. The battles you have in your own mind - are we doing the right thing? Is there an alternative? The fear. - are the things that consume your every waking moment until the time where she's finally asleep and they're wheeling her into theatre. Even then, you're still questioning your decision, but there's no turning back and there's no alternative but to wait the long wait, pray for her safety and trust that those working on her do the best job possible.

But now we're on the other side and there's definitely no going back - nor do we want to. Her relief is palpable, as is mine. I glance at her stats on the machine but they don't call for my attention at all, in fact they just confirm what I can see in front of me- my girl doing well.

The world outside & at home is going about it's own business but in here we feel enveloped in a cocoon of peace & relief. Nurses come in and do their thing, make her comfortable and tell her how well she's doing, a physio came in before & had a little chat, her consultant has been in to say hi and confirmed she's doing beautifully. This is our life at the moment and I'm content for it to be so.

It feels so good to be on this side of things. It really does. I, for one, am not looking to move from here too quickly.